2
i never really paid attention in geometry class
probably because i was always watching you
i don’t even remember the silly mnemonic
that seemed insensitive to native americans
it was something about cosines
our teacher was a blowhard anyways
you were fascinated
by the fact i couldn’t ride a bike and
just like every man after you
would proclaim you
were somehow going to teach me
how to conquer the bicycle
you also tied my shoes for me
during study hall when it was just the two of us
emphasizing the bunny ears
half smiling when
i told you that my brain knew
just that my hands did not
?
the next year it was chemistry class
of course we had to be partners
everyone thought we would shoot up the school
if they knew either of us they should have expected
bombs hydrogen bombs
i would hum the noble gases to myself
as you stared and stared and stared
boring twig of a boy
you were so petrified
enamored by the weird gay kid
who just had to like you of all people
i never paid attention in chemistry
you would drive me home
and i would cry
in front of you
giving blowjobs for rides
giving up all my integrity
just to even touch
you
played me like a theremin
telling people stories about
“your girlfriend”
we both received an a in chemistry
A
we would skip lunch
together to hide in the library
i would eat my lunch
you would eat nothing
we were both skeletons
during american history our obese teacher would do his
taxes and business inquiries instead of teaching
so i would play harvest moon and you’d laugh
at my cows all named after colors
even though magenta had won me first place at the cow festival
i named a chicken after you
we also shared a literature class
and any opportunity to work together you took it
and when we had any days in the library
we would take the computers in the back
you had your hand on the mouse and mine on your cock
it didn’t stop at school
i would lie to my parents
taking the train to lindenwold
you would stand at the station smoking a cigarette
against my abnormal lungs insistence that you shouldn’t
and i shouldn’t have followed you into your basement
and let you play call of duty while i played with your joystick
your birthday falling three days before christmas made it expensive
i said you have a different birthday jesus
of course you get two presents
so i bought you a stupid shirt and vans
to fit your poser skater persona when you couldn’t even land a kickflip
you had bought me the new harvest moon
i asked if you had any plans for us after graduation
and you told me that that’s when this experiment ends
“take me home”
you didn’t mean it like that
“it’s over
i want to leave”
you started the ignition
and we sat in silence for the hour drive home
