“Dad, how come my classmates keep saying you’re stupid for what you wrote in the newspaper?” My daughter screamed as soon as I got home from work.
I thought to myself, I’ve been hearing this all week from everyone else, now I have to explain this to my daughter. This will be interesting. “Honey, I think this is because their parents may not share the same opinions as me,” I began to explain.
“Well why is that? I think you are a pretty smart guy if you ask me.” She said this while slowly smiling, trying to lighten the mood.
I pour a cup of coffee and we continue the conversation. As a parent, I find this to be a good time to reintegrate a life lesson of respecting others’ opinions. I could easily insist that they are simply wrong and push forward my own agenda, but I think she is capable of making her own opinions, plus she has already read my letter.
She asks me, “what is their opinion and why do they feel this way?”
It is now my job to take a step back and honestly consider this while also avoiding my own bias. “You see I think it is a bad idea to go through with the current development plan because of the long term effects. Many of these folks do not agree with this.” She listens intently. “They have some good ideas though. In their opinion the best way to deal with our current economic issues is to build this mall and high-rise apartment buildings. This will give our area new jobs and more revenue.” I stop and pause waiting to see how she digests what I said.
My daughter is very bright so she understands our current economic situation in the sense that people around us are struggling, but she is a child.
“I think it would be really cool to have a mall nearby to shop at instead of a few stores downtown!” She exclaims.
I respond, “this is a main argument for people supporting the plan. They like the idea of convenience and options. People really do like options. Giving people the ability to choose really is a big influence, especially in our city, where there aren’t many big retail stores.”
She fires back, “also some of the houses in the neighborhood are falling apart, so nice new apartments can’t be that bad, right?”
“This is also true. Some houses in our neighborhood are falling apart mostly because of foreclosures and not being able to afford the upkeep of the homes. In theory, adding these apartments will counteract the decomposition of our surrounding neighborhoods.” I answer back after a short moment of thought.
“Are there any other positive things that this project could bring to us Dad?” She intriguingly asks.
I answer, “I think another big motivation for the project is the jobs. There’s a lot of people out of work and the building of these projects provides many folks with construction jobs. Some of these people have been out of work for a while now as construction came to a halt after the recession in 2008. Also, after the completion of the mall all those stores will need people to work there. At this time, having a low wage job is viewed as better than having no job and using the state to get by. It is believed that jobs like this will help a lot of us get back on our feet and proceed forward.”
“See I think that’s a great thing, people working. It makes me sad to see people without jobs struggling to get by,” she states. For a young girl, she is very smart and has paid attention to her elder’s conversations.
“This is why this plan is important to people. They want a solution to this struggle and they see this as a way out. There could be other ways out, but to many, they aren’t feasible. Most folks just don’t see any other way of doing things and will stick with the status quo.” I respond diligently.
“Okay, so Dad. why are they calling you stupid?” She asked. This is probably what she was really interested in the whole time. “Why is my father stupid when I see him as smart?”
Anyway I respond, “they think I’m stupid because they don’t agree with my points. I would say that’s okay, but they could have acknowledged, just as I just did, that there are positives in what I said. I may have not done that in my letter, but that’s because I was trying to get my point across and was hoping to start dialogue. I wanted folks to react strongly and give their opinions. I may have come off too strongly for some and failed to acknowledge the other side, like I just did with you. Basically they view me as stupid because I don’t agree with them,” I explained.
This satisfied her questions, as the strain on her attention span was too much. She ran out of the room chasing after the dog.